Did I subconsciously sabotage myself today?

I've been doing some reflection on my interview today. Unfortunately nothing about the interview itself, but my action afterwards.

After all, if anyone in the office saw me grab a handful of rubbers on the way out of the door, they'd surely ask, "who was that strange, suit dressed man who took a handful of condoms on the wait out the door today?"

Since its a sensitive facility working with  vulnerable, at-risk youth it wouldn't be surprising if they asked around, and it wouldn't take long before te question was answered. "Oh, that must of been the guy who interviewed for the Vulnerable Child Case Manager job. Gee, what would he possibly want with a handful of condoms?"

Those are some awfully small ifs. The realm of possibility here is very high.

So did I do it?

"Why not?"

Cause its unprofessional and could ruin your chances with this job.

So why? Not that free condoms are hard to find (in fact, they are. At least for me. About as hard as it is finding women who want to use them properly with me.)

Knowing it would jeopardize my job chances, why did I do it?

Was I subconsciously sabotaging my opportunity here?

That's the crux of my question.

Many times during my job hunt when I've sought advice, advisors ask something along those lines: Am I doing something subconsciously wrong?

Am I a sociopath?

It kinda pisses me off, cause its suggesting that I AM TO BLAME. That I'm not trying hard enough. That I'd sacrifice my relationship and my sanity just.... Cause. Cause some people are leeches and I must be leeching off the system.

Needless to say, that's not the case. But I still wonder why I grab a couple condoms on the way out today. Maybe cause I wanted to blog about it.