An interview, blah blah

This photo is actually relevant to the interview I had.

Yesterday I had my first interview in nearly a month. (Though, in all fairness, I had a sorta-interview with a friend of a friend's place last week. It was an impossible job, that had several misfitting aspects of it. We agreed I wasn't a good fit).

Yesterday's interview was for an... community organization in my hometown. (I don't really want to move back to my hometown, but the thought has come up for reasons I may get into some point later). I'd applied their on a whim and -Holy Cow!- they contacted me pretty soon after for an interview.

I was over-qualified and the pay was on the low-end (but good for the field). But phone interviews -like most interviews- are... weird? Lackluster? Disheartening? Leave much to be desired?

I know I was nervous at first and answered question awkwardly, but I tried engaging her, the interviewer. I'd like to think I was successful in that regard (engaging). I doubt very much I'll go to round two.

SHE ASKED A FEW QUESTIONS that threw me off.  First, "Tell me about yourself". Um, a bit too general. Where do you want me to start? With my birth? Cause that's fascinating. (Aside from the miracle of life, there are other interesting aspects of my birth -mostly, the location- that makes an interesting story, people drop their jaws, and it's almost relative to the position.)

But I didn't start with my birth. I also didn't start with my 18th birthday, or specifically three months later when I flew across the ocean to spend the better part of two years tramping around Asia.

Maybe I should have. Instead I just tried giving a narrative of my "career".

WHICH SEGUED TO AN AWKWARD, LEADING QUESTION, one I fear: "You've done a lot of different things. Why is that? Have you tried changing careers?"

I thought it wasn't far. My professional narrative is clear that Career Path 1 resulted in side projects of Career Path 2, which lead perfectly to my graduate degree. (Shit, woman, if you want to piss an interviewee off, you know how to do it!) I tried underscoring that point. I don't know if I succeeded.

I never know if I've ever succeeded with the minor details of interviewing (like, the part that doesn't land the job).

Which reminds me: I've wanted something for this whole job hunt experience: someone to call up interviewers (after my interviewer, after I've been rejected) and do some QC on my interview. That's really what I want a career counselor to do: forget the theoretical, what about people's actual opinions of my actual interviews?

I'd love to do tit-for-tat with someone in this regard. I'd love this blog to get read enough that I could pose that offer to my readers and the line "if you want to do this, leave a message in the comments" didn't come across as awkward.

You mean I'm not alone?

I have mixed feelings about Gawker's piece on being unemployed.

Yes, I know, lots of people are unemployed. I could be worse off! But... but... I'm sure I speak for EVERYONE who submitted to that project that we're hardly consoled knowing that.

It's a national tragedy. I just want to help people. Shit, come on.

Here's a photo cause people like photos.

This is what 900 resumes looks like

One application off today (a horrible online process for a position I'm waaay over qualified for and I doubt pays over $12/hr), three applications yesterday (slight alterations of the same one; again, not too hopeful) and six other earlier this week and I think I can say I've applied to over 900 positions.

By now, I'm just applying for applying's sake.

And I think that number should bring me more shame than it is.

How did I jump to 900? Why, the way all statistics are done: with subtle manipulation!

Well, sorta.

Though I graduated in June, 2009, according to my handy-dandy job hunt spreadsheet (on which I keep pretty thorough details), my job hunt started in earnest in April. I applied to 11 jobs that month, one of which resulted in an interview (which they never got back to me, and to where I recently applied to another position. Odd.)

My first interview was actually in February, which I think might be an error on my spreadsheet.

Number of applications/interviews per month until I get tired of counting:

2011
Feb:  7/1
Mar:  5/0
Apr:  11/1
May:  6/1
Jun:    27/3* (one place I applied 6/11, but it wasn't until 3/12 that they got back to me for an interview.)
Jul:    42/0 (this is when my girlfriend told me to kick it into high gear)
Aug:  100/5 (this is when I start carpet-bombing, applying to any/every position for which I vaguely qualify)
Sep:  106/7

Ok, you get the point.

Important note: I'd like to think that I'm "90% qualified" for the vast majority of the jobs I apply to. Of the 900 jobs, I'd like to think less than 150 are complete throw-aways.

I also tailor every resume and cover letter to the job (except those throw-aways I mentioned).

If I were better at graphics, I'd design some whitty graphs. Until then, just trust me.

Can I start drinking yet?

WILL WORK FOR FREE

Today's mull-over: "Will work for free"

I'm wondering how it would work to just offer my services for free to a worthy organization, (cause frankly trying to get paid employment isn't working).

"MPA, mulit-lingual, 12 years professional experience, committed to making the world a better place, thrives in diversity, excellent references, etc..."

I realize I have a few caveats: not for profit (cause if it's going to be for a for-profit, they better pay me); limit 20 hours a week (but open to different situations); not long-term (one month? three months?).

Think it would work? And how can I make it work?

I posted this on Facebook. "Volunteer!" Said a friend.

I'm looking at that too. Essentially I'm looking to volunteer extensively and long-term.

What's weird is how difficult that is to do.

First, you gotta verify their reliability and ability. Then you gotta train the person. And if they're really qualified, then why aren't they working?

Meaning, people think you're weird.

I'll let you know how it goes.

Am I doing it all wrong?

I've cranked out 10 resume/applications -all of them tailored to the specific position- in the last three days.

That brings the total to nearly 880 (I'll talk about those number in the next few days).

Which brings me to wonder, am I doing it all wrong?

I almost feel like sometimes I'm just applying to jobs for the sake of applying. Like, I secretly want to brag about the number of resumes I've sent out; I want to boast about how long I've been unemployed; I want to wallow in making poverty wages.

(I really don't want to brag and boast about all that, thus the word "secretly".)

So, am I doing it all wrong?

Should I even bother applying to these places?

Mind you, today I applied to two nearly identical jobs with the city. I'm very qualified for both. The chances of me getting the jobs are probably nil. Or to be more exact, 1 out of 500, which is essentially nil.

So why bother?

Does applying to a job actually get you the job?

I'm beginning to think it doesn't.

Three up, three down.

Follow-up from those interviews I had last week: both emailed me today that they were pursuing other candidates.

To top it off, I actually got a phone call (a Phone Call!) from the job I interviewed for a month ago! (and she said, "wow, it's been nearly a month now...").  The call was just a polite confirmation of what I suspected: they offered the job to someone else.

So that's three -count 'em, 3- rejections in one day!

Wow!

Most people would be bummed by this, but it's all just par for the course.

Just in case you think I'm lazy

For some reason I started reminiscing on my first professional job hunt.

It was 1996. I had just graduated from college and moved to Minneapolis, cause it was the closest big city that I hadn't been to and I wanted to try something new. In fact I had a list of career goals:

• Work in an inner city school
• Work with refugees
• Work with an international organization
• Teach ESL
• Work with non-proft
• Visit 9th and Hennepin, where all the donuts have names that sound like prostitutes*
• And also visit 9th and Euclid, something about a famous dirty bookstore**

Soon after I landed there was an article in the paper. I remember it well, it profiled a recent college grad from a good university, multi-skilled, spoke another language, etc etc. She hoped to go far. Instead said the article, she worked three minimum wage jobs -one at a shoe store- and barely made $20k

There's a lot to unpack in that article and a lot is relevant today. But then I think I blew her off as a whiner. 

Gotta pay your dues!

So I trudged ahead to pay my dues. 

1-       Got a job as a Customer Service Rep at the local cable company through a friend's relative. After two days I realized it fit none of why I'd moved, a fact that made me, so I quit. 

2-       That night I saw an add in the weekly paper. Something about making a difference in the world. I later learned this ad is in the back of every weekly paper in the country. It in itself became a funny story, but the place sucked, lest because the boss didn't disclose the 50 hr work week for a salary of $14k a year. Work gave me strep throat. I quit. 

3-       I quit job #2 because I  had stumbled on to a series of part-time work. I had the following schedule for a few weeks. First I woke up and interned at the internationally minded nonprofit. I ended up volunteering for them for years. 

4-       In the afternoons I drove over to St Paul and work the evening shift at a call center for a non-profit research group. I liked it. 

5-       Then after eating dinner in my car, I worked the graveyard shift at UPS! Teamster! My sup was 19 years old, and he thought I was being a smartass when, during orientation and "what to do in case if a tornado hits the building", I asked if. Tornado had ever hit the building. I was serious. ("No, a tornado has never hit this building".)

6-       On the weekends I worked at St Joe's Home for Children as a residential care worker. It was the first of my career working with abused and at-risk kids. 

7-       After a few wks of this routine, I got a call to work a dream job teaching ESL to immigrants in an inner city school. It was only part time, but there was good chance of going full time in the new year. I quit the UPS job but the call center begged me to stay until the holidays. 

8-       I also somehow snagged a part-time evening job teaching ESL to adults. Like the high school gig, it was initially a sub job with a promise for the next year. 

So I got up at seven in the morning, drove to St Paul to teach for a few hours, then worked at my internship before going to the call center. On Tuesday and Thursday eves I taught adults and the weekends I was at the children's home. 

That's five jobs at once, eight jobs in a year (starting in August).

And I still didn't make over $20k a year. 

* See: "9th and Hennepin"

**See: "Christmas card from a hooker in Minneapolis"